Crimbo in Scroogeland

Crimbo in Scroogeland

I

sale of humbug get it while it's fact

free to air on every issue top

terms for sporting butts of jokes well licked

spittle on tap

who'll be next to have their bell ends kicked

sparring partners sought by legal chaps

bloody Corbynism's gone & died

hallelujah

rounded up the readership last week

let ‘em go in Epping forest rode

horse & hounds till Sunday lunch & what

fun we all had

not that Corbyns everywhere don't have

preaching rights to dismal creeds a-hem

sacred texts for England’s donchya know

open for biz

sell us what you got the market tells

good from bad with trickle down on toast

make a bee-line Honey Russian gold

buys any thing

II

let’s define what Corbyn meant at worst

honest peaceful good ideas hope

courage youth & wisdom arm-in-arm

all the above

flaunted openly as if as if

rightly trounced for who can tell the truth

nowadays it’s only fools believe

what a man says

lies have trumped were only fiction trod

onward into battle close the ranks

stop the tide of reason in its tracks

haul up the pumps

hands on deck you fools this ark will float

Jonah’s whale I'd rather go to hell

in a barrel roll the ocean flat

out till no bells

now hear this if anyone of you

was a Corbynista make it plain

or forever hold your tongues dismiss

I'll be below

III

curses where did Corbyn keep his charts

rum no luck the vessel's dry or smoke

coke would be a blessing take a line

Miss Whatsyourname

I remember Winston Churchill well

not at all in fact his finest hours

underground spent plotting Hitler's doom

just like this room

sorry cabin where was I oh yes

seems we’re in a right old bloody mess

thanks to Corbyn's failure fingers go

drumming on desk

switch the channel Moby bloody Dick's

hardly Christmas viewing when's The Speech

time to be decisive take a stand

business is biz

Ma'am forgive me what I uttered then

wasn’t quite exactly on the nail

coffins float I hope so overboard

here's what to say

not Crook-shank